Awkward in 140
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Because life is awkward, and people tweet this sh*t
Send awkward tweets to email@example.com, use #awkward in your tweet, or mention us @awkwardin140
@awkwardin140 Me-“Hey! Your birthday’s Dec. 3rd. Mine’s on the 2nd.” Him-“My wife died on Dec. 2nd, so I can never forget it.” #awkward
Mom on my brightly painted yellow wall-“Even Ray Charles could c that!” My blind friend was there,she didn’t no he was blind
I love discussing sexcapades in the office with my co workers. Who wouldve known that I work with sluts?
If women can have pms.. then men should be able to have espn - (one liners)
My History professor: “If my lectures bore you, just think of this- Every 10 seconds, someone has a sexual thought.” #awkward
Heard this @ cookout: “So what if she’s my cousin. I just won’t cum in her.”-
Excuse me stewartress? Can you please ask the pilot to bank the plane really hard to the right? #awkward #delta
Yes, #Palin referred to her “retarded baby”, but she was talking about Levi. #awkward #waterboardlevi
five year old just introduced classmate to me as “You know her, The-Girl-who-pooped-in-her-pants-a-long-time-ago……” #AWKWARD
I hope this pic is photoshop’d. Seriously. #Obama #awkward
I’d suck a fart out of your ass and hold it like a bong hit. Lol.
So we left them. It was kind of like saying, “Sorry I threw up on your bed. Here’s a russian girl.” #awkward
— D. A.
come over to myspace so i can twitter your yahoo and google all over your facebook
She told me she was an outie, not an innie. Which seemed fine. Except it turns out she was talking about her vagina.
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